This week has been dubbed ‘divorce week’ because of the spike in the number of couples seeking legal advice after a fraught Christmas at home. Maybe you are one of the thousands of unhappy couples who waited to see how Christmas panned out but now want to start the new year afresh. A new you? A new life? A clean break? Along with your other new year’s resolutions (to lose a stone, to drink less, spend less) divorce is up there in the top 5. You want an end to the constant bickering and strife in a household that was once filled with unending love and the sweet smell of roses.
But make no mistake. Divorce isn’t always the best course of action. You carry yourself and your own problems into a new life. The problems and issues that have dogged you for so long don’t instantly or miraculously go away after divorce. All you will be doing is carrying them into the next relationship and the next and the next until you finally wake up to the realization that YOU are the problem.
I’ll tell you why YOU are the problem. I realized this myself a long time ago when it was all too late to save my own marriage. Like me you’ve failed to a great extent to understand how he/she ticks. You haven’t grasped the fundamentals.
‘I just don’t understand women’ is a phase we often here. Or ‘Men. What is it with them?’
Instead of reaching for the phone this week to book an appointment with a lawyer do yourself a big favour. It won’t cost much. You’ll need a day at least to read the book that every couple should be reading and digesting:
‘Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus’ by John Gray.
You’ve probably heard of the book. You may even have read it. But you may have forgotten much of the advice contained within it. You may have dismissed it as poppycock. It really isn’t. It’s brilliant. It’s spot on. Men and women are fundamentally different in the way they think and until you truly understand why the opposite sex behaves as they do for a reason you will go on blaming them and being upset by their actions. It’s all about appreciating our differences and devising ways to accommodate these differences in the way you live.
Hang on in there. Don’t be another divorce statistic. It’s not the easy route out. Reviving your love can be one of the most exciting new year’s resolutions you can make.
And if you like reading relationship sagas you may like my novel. It was an Amazon bestseller over the Christmas period:
‘The Catholic Woman’s Dying Wish’ Here’s the link:
